I'm still catching up on TV from being away last week, so this week you're getting double the Upper East Side drama!
The start of this episode of Gossip Girl feels like a dream - a dream that finds us very far in the future compared to where we left off (Chuck and Blair's accident). In this dream-like scene Chuck and Louis are friendly to each other and we learn Blair lost the baby. This is not a dream, however, this is where we currently stand.
Blair and Dan are sneaking around together and Chuck comes to Brooklyn to confront Dan about their tryst. Dan has a great line, "I live in Brooklyn. Without Gossip Girl, I know nothing." In this scene we also learn Dan has received a second book deal. As if!
When Blair is trying on her bridal gown Vera Wang herself makes a cameo! I gasped when I saw her on screen! Her petite frame and long, jet black hair was such a stark contrast to Blair's billowing, white gown.
When Chuck follows Blair and Dan from Vera Wang back to this strange apartment, I was mystified how Dan did not hear Chuck's voice when Chuck was right at the bottom of the stairs of the brownstone. Hm.
Later in the episode we learn Blair prayed for Chuck to wake up from the accident and said if he did, she would stay with Louis! What? That makes zero sense! We also learn that Blair has converted to Catholicism and has been going to church every day with Dan. Oy.
Blair doesn't want anyone to know the truth about her feelings for Chuck or Louis, so when she risks being exposed for having an affair with Dan, she goes yenta and says, "I'll endure the public humiliation of allegedly shtupping Humphrey."
Can I just say I hate that this whole episode was on New Years Eve when it aired a full two weeks after actual New Years Eve. Hello, stay relevant!
I find it cruel that Chuck had watch Blair and Louis kiss at midnight.
This episode Lily tries to track down Charlie and winds up finding her biological niece, the actual Charlie Rhodes. Do you think Lily will continue pursuing her in future episodes?
Toward the end of the episode Serena says she wants to become the positive, new and improved Gossip Girl. Um, Gossip Girl is so awesome because she is wicked, not because she is healing the world.
On a similar note, Nate and Gossip Girl are now texting about the events of the night of the accident. Nate has learned that the car that crashed was meant for him, not Chuck and Blair. Oh, here we go again!
In closing, thank you to the CW for highlighting musician Zee Avi and her haunting song "Ghostbird" that was featured in this episode. It was the perfect song choice for this melancholy hour.
This episode of Gossip Girl opens with Serena and Dan talking about their fake relationship. Serena says, "If you want the world to think you're doing something, you have to do it on Madison Avenue."
Next up, Blair goes to church to confession and says, "I fear the devil is on my shoulder." To which the father responds, "Which devil is that?" and she replies, "Chuck Bass." Ha!
It turns out the priest is not her priest, but the spiritual leader of Monaco, who is in cahoots with Louis' sister!
Over at the Spectator, Nate decides to pull Serena's column at the request of Gossip Girl. He later stages firing Serena and then sends a video of their fight to Gossip Girl. Just as I was staring to lose this story line and question who is on whose side, we discover that Nate and Serena set up Tripp! And now, Maureen is going to divorce Tripp. Excellent.
The last five minutes of the episode were packed! Chuck tries to visit Blair, Blair finds Louis' wedding vows (which we learn were written by Dan!), Beatrice gets shipped off to East Africa, the priest calls in re-inforcements in the form of Chuck, and Serena and Dan continue their faux romance.
The episode closes with a classic Chuck Bass moment. He agrees to help the priest break up Blair and Louis and says, "She already thinks I'm a villain, I may as well become one."
In previews for next week Blair and Louis' wedding ceremony is interrupted by Chuck and Georgina? What the hell is she doing back? And looking so possessed! I guess we'll find out next week. See you then!
*Images courtesy of CW.com.