The Bachelorette: Guard And Protect Your Heart

Tonight my Bachelorette viewing buddy and I were reunited to watch this week's episode of Ali's journey to find love. Below our thoughts, musings and horror:

- Ali gets made over by InStyle. Why are there camera flash bulbs? Ali says, “Let’s get me in style!” Hello00000, scripted!

- Why is Ali having a photo shoot?

- Chris L. explaining the difference between real love and unicorn love = priceless.

- Kasey compares Ali to a cocoon turning into a butterfly, ready for love. Gag.

- Kasey breaks into song. I covered my face in shame. Silence. Cut to commercial.

- Group date for the All Star crew. No invite for Rated R because he didn’t feel the need to shave.

- When did “guard and protect your heart” become a catch phrase?

- “This is just my heart. Jump in, stay awhile.” - Kasey. Nuf said.

- And Kasey is singing again. From the couch, "He is vom-a-licious."

- Group date: Kirk, Frank, Ty, Roberto, Jesse, Weatherman, Craig. Solid group!

- Product placement overload: first InStyle, now the Lion King (like Ali knows how many Tony’s they won).

- Boys in blank spandex, doing Broadway choreography? Frightening.

- Singing auditions. From the couch, "Good thing Kasey isn’t on this date.”

- Jesse can sing? Hotness times 10 million.

- “Roberto looked her in the eyes and sang to her. That’s the first thing I should have thought of!” – Kirk

- Frank gets jealous of Ali and Roberto. From the couch, "Frank is going to commit homicide on this series."

- Ali not giving out roses this episode. No rose for Kasey, no rose on the group date.

- Kirk tucks Ali in because she is feeling sick. From the couch, "Well done, Kirk."

- The second one-on-one date goes to Chris L. Woot!

- Chris brings Ali flowers and soup to her room since she still isn't feeling well.

- Ali gets some energy back and she and Chris head to 230 5th, where I was this past Friday night! Chris gets the rose. Joshua Radin performs on the roof. They finally have a make out.

- Cocktail party time. Ali's black jumpsuit - GROSS.

- Kasey was about to show Ali his tattoo when he got saved by Frank! You are lucky Kasey. That would have been the final nail.

- Craig gets a rose. From the couch, “I guess he just needs to say two sentences each week and he’ll be fine.”

- Chris N. gets a rose. From the couch, “What? No. I don’t believe in this. Chris "N" like "Nobody knows him!"

- Ali picks Kasey over Jesse and the Weatherman. You are letting the hotness that is Jesse go home to keep Mr. Guard and Protect Your Heart? COME ON.

- Next stop: Iceland! Cute preview of a one-on-one date with Kirk. He is becoming a fast favorite.

We agreed tonight we would like to fast forward to the final four: Roberto, Chris L., Kirk and Frank. Sorry boys, the front runners are clear.

Be sure to check out Entertainment Weekly for the episode recap and host Chris Harrison's blog!

 

Molly Galler

Welcome to Pop.Bop.Shop. My name is Molly. I’m a foodie, fashionista, pop culture addict and serious travel junkie. I’m a lifelong Bostonian obsessed with frozen confections, outdoor patios, Mindy Kaling, reality television, awards shows, tropical vacations, snail mail and my birthday.

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