Thank you BRAVO TV for giving us a juicy sneak peak into the next season of the Real Housewives! The next installment will premiere on May 12th and will debut a new cast: The Real Housewives of New Jersey.
Apparently BRAVO was having trouble digging up ladies willing to let camera crews into their lives, since three of the five women on this next season are related! Caroline and Dina are sisters, in a family with 11 children. Jacqui is married Caroline and Dina's brother Chris. Did I mention that Caroline and Dina are married to two men that are brothers? Are you keeping up? Then, outside the huge Italian family, there are the other two housewives Teresa and Danielle.
Caroline is the ultimate alpha dog. She puts RHW-O.C.'s Vicki to shame. Caroline makes Vicki look like a tame, calm, barbie on tranquilizers. Caroline has three children and helps her husband run their business - Brownstone, which is a catering and function hall. Did I mention two of her children work there, as well as Dina's husband? And oh yeah, Dina has an office there too.
Dina has a 12 year old daughter Lexi who says "My mom and I are more like sisters. I have no idea what I'd do if I had an old, fat mom." Nice. Dina has been married to her current husband 3 years, but apparently he's been home two and half weeks of those three years. Nice. Dina runs her own event planning business (out of the Brownstone) and thinks people see her as a gold digger. Let us watch the premiere, then we'll be the judge of that.
Poor Jacqui is from Las Vegas and married into this huge New Jersey Italian family. She has a 17 year old daughter from a previous marriage and a 6 year old son with her current husband Chris. She has been trying to have another child for a few years, but has had continued heartbreak. She feels very overwhelmed by Caroline and Dina and their massive family. I feel badly for her already.
Then we have Teresa. Married to a total Sopranos like Jersey guy who is allegedly in the construction business. They have three daughters who Teresa takes shopping 2-3 times per week and she is trying to help her oldest daughter break into acting. They have been building their dream house for three years (that must be a pretty big dream) and Teresa also wants her husband to finance her boob job. His response "Happy wife, happy life."
Then there's Danielle. Danielle is basically Sheree from RHW-ATL. She is 45, single, obsessed with herself and her body, and is anxiously awaiting her divorce settlement. She has two daughters, 10 and 14, a 26 year old boyfriend who is apparently phenomenal at phone sex. This one is the instigator, I can already feel it.
With OC, NYC and ATL behind us, its time to focus the microscope on the armpit of America: the dirty Jerz.
